serious post before bed goodnight
no but seriously
i was in a hell of a low mood when i got back and this really helped
but i still yearn for cuddles and kisses and yes making love or whatever with someone pretty who smells nice
i keep imagining walking to the park outside of this house
and meeting a nice girl and talking about life and the world and everything
and then going back to her place and drinking
and then you know doing the whole kissy face thing and the stuff that comes after
it’s dorkish but i miss that intimacy and i just miss being with someone
i’ve kind of pretty much abandoned all hope that anyhting like that is ever going to happen to me again at anypoint with anyone
especially moving back to singapore where the chances of that happening are nil and since i’ll only be there a year…
also being a massive cum slut probably doesn’t help
yeah it’s not happening
but you’re all beautiful wonderful people and honestly i hope you’re all as happy as i wish i could be and i wish i could hang out with you
but noone i think who could be compatible with me is ever going to find me or ever going to be interested so i’ll just sort of fade away i guess and keep doing what i’m doing and one day realize that all my friends have married and i’m that one single guy who never found anyone and i’ll tell myself it’s okay but it really won’t be
that is a legitimate fear of mine
anyway
leave nice things in my ask if you bothered to read this
‘night
